Seeing as it’s Easter, I thought I’d add a fun, competitive twist to the blog and have therefore hidden Ricardo Montalban three times throughout this treatise. See if you can find Ricardo Montalban at least once. Why not challenge a friend? Remember, you’re looking for Ricardo Montalban. Technically, there are now more celebrity TV chefsContinue reading “‘Too Many Cooks . . .’ –A Treatise on the History of TV Chefs in the UK”
Author Archives: gloriabellyrub
‘A Plagiaristic Eulogy’ – A Treatise on an Anti-Christ
I can’t take credit for this treatise as it was actually written by Clematis Flange, the satirical editor for The Beano. I came across the work whilst in the waiting room at the clinic. In exchange for my sample, they allowed me to keep the comic. In the original, which acted as a prologue toContinue reading “‘A Plagiaristic Eulogy’ – A Treatise on an Anti-Christ”
‘I’ll See Your Four Emperors and Raise You Five’ – A Treatise on 69AD – The Year of At Least Four Emperors
Since Augustus Caesar took control of the Roman Republic and rebranded it as the Roman Empire in 27BC until Nero decided to stop fiddling and instead fall on his bow in 68AD, the Julio-Claudian dynasty had been in charge. Summo canibus. Which is of course Latin for ‘top dogs’ and Geordie for ‘an excellent coachContinue reading “‘I’ll See Your Four Emperors and Raise You Five’ – A Treatise on 69AD – The Year of At Least Four Emperors”
‘Death Tap Dances’ – A Treatise on the Ill-Fated Seventh Seal Musical
The fateful adaptation of ‘The Seventh Seal’ into a musical, funded by Formula 1 magnate, Bernie Ecclestone, was one of the most infamous flops in the history of Broadway. In this treatise I explore the production’s history and prod tenderly at the reasons why it might have failed so calamitously. When the great Swedish director,Continue reading “‘Death Tap Dances’ – A Treatise on the Ill-Fated Seventh Seal Musical”
‘Ill-Advised Poultry Gifts’ – A Treatise on ‘The Twelve Days of Christmas’
One of the most common festive sounds is that quaint old English ditty of ‘The Twelve Days of Christmas’. But what are the origins of the unusual gifts attributed to the misguided generosity of the narrator’s truelove? In this treatise I’ve rooted out the truth behind the seemingly cryptic lyrics. A Partridge in a PearContinue reading “‘Ill-Advised Poultry Gifts’ – A Treatise on ‘The Twelve Days of Christmas’”
‘The Lying Toad’ – A Treatise on a Rediscovered Grimm Fairy Tale
Scholars of classic German Literature were delighted recently when a lost work by the Brothers Grimm was unearthed by workmen, who were refitting a harbour master’s boiler in Oberammergau. The work, which was dated to 1847, was serialised on the back of Bryant & May match boxes. Below, I’ve reproduced verbatim the translation produced byContinue reading “‘The Lying Toad’ – A Treatise on a Rediscovered Grimm Fairy Tale”
‘It’s a Hoot’ – A Treatise on British Owls
As we approach the 500th anniversary of the Battle of Pavia and Holy Roman Emperor Charles V’s decisive victory, it seems appropriate to explore the different owls native to the British Isles. Barn Owl (Tyto Alba) – For many years, it was believed that the bird was named after the man who discovered it, LeonardoContinue reading “‘It’s a Hoot’ – A Treatise on British Owls”
‘Hanging Tough’ – A Treatise on the Importance of Drapery in the Plays of Anton Chekhov
It cannot merely be a coincidence that Chekhov’s first play, the unpublished during his lifetime ‘Platinov’ that the drapes are a simple off-white cotton affair. “Chekhov was not yet ready to fully embrace the potentiality of substantial drapes in a dramatic production,“*1 stated Professor Catherine Klinger, a Lecturer in Russian Literature at Harvard, when sheContinue reading “‘Hanging Tough’ – A Treatise on the Importance of Drapery in the Plays of Anton Chekhov”
‘Cats and Dogs’ – A Treatise on the History of Precipitation
Rain was invented in Polynesia in about 6000B.C. It first appears in cave paintings on Samoa dating from that period. “It’s difficult to be certain,“ says archaeometeorologist, Professor Nonkenstein of Vermont University, “but it appears to be quite a heavy squall.“ Most experts agree, although TV’s Laurence Llewelyn-Bowen claims the brushstrokes indicate a lightContinue reading “‘Cats and Dogs’ – A Treatise on the History of Precipitation”
‘Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?’ – A Treatise on the Origin of Jokes
The best way to kill a joke is by explaining how it works. Another way is by exploring and investigating its origins. In this treatise I intend to murder several of the English language’s most stalwart rib-ticklers. “My wife has gone to the West Indies.” “Jamaica?” “No, she went of her own accord.” This jokeContinue reading “‘Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?’ – A Treatise on the Origin of Jokes”
